Gambling..

I have no problem with anyone gambling. What I have a problem with is when it affects the people around you. My mom, for instance, wasted a whole check at the casino. I was so mad at her. I even texted her trying to stop her.

It makes me so mad because that’s my mom and when she gets home, she beats herself up for doing it and im just like STFU AND STOP FUCKING UP. But as her daughter, I don’t say anything. My mom is way stronger than this, so I don’t understand why the hell she would do this. Hasn’t she learned from the way her mom would gamble? I don’t know how to make her understand without making her cry or feel guilty.

Telephone: Chapter Six

Once Michelle and Aaliyah got off the phone, Michelle got dressed up to go see her grandmother, Grace. Grace was always supportive in making sure Michelle followed her dream. She hadn’t her father for drinking and not caring for his daughter like he was suppose to, but Grace knew that Michelle was a strong girl just like her. Never afraid to stand for themselves and never step down from a challenge. Grace’s eyes became brighter and delightful when she saw Michelle. She lived in a nursing home where the nurses treated her like shit and the food was never good well. Michelle would always bring a home-cooked meal when she saw her grandmother. They had fell so closer with each other that when Michelle and her ex-boyfriend broke up, she didn’t go to her mom but she went to her grandmother. Her mom would always say, β€œIt’s okay, honey…. You’ll be fine.” But she wasn’t fine. She spent months crying over him and wishing he came back. This same situation happen when Joshua left for military school. At the time, he was with Chrissy but Michelle and Joshua were friends, but not as close.

Michelle day always brightens up when she sees her grandmother. She never is in a bad mood, she is always nice to everyone, and she can turn that frown upside down. As Grace ate the lovely meal that her granddaughter made her, Michelle was going to tell her grandmother she got accepted into college.

She told her… No response? Grace stopped while still chewing and look at Michelle like she was crazy. Then the biggest grin came upon Grace’s face. Grace was happy but sad that her grown granddaughter was finally going to college. The college wasn’t too far away from the nursing home, so Michelle could go see her whenever she wanted. Her father will probably die without her, but Michelle didn’t really care. She had Josh back and her grandmother and thats all she really needed.

As Michelle and Grace begin to talk about old times…an old memory came back in Michelle’s mind. When her mother and father got along, when the whole family, including in grandmother would go to the beach and spend the whole day there until sunset rose. It was a family tradition they did whenever it was really hot in the summer time. Michelle missed those good times and she wish it never ended, but as begins to grow up she starts to realize that it is never too late to make new memories. She, one day would be able to take her kids to the beach and watch them grow into wonderful children. She wasn’t going to end up like her dad and mom did. Only reason they stayed married was because Michelle begged them to stay together or she was going to run away and live with her grandmother. After her mom got cancer, everything changed..everyone changed.

A month.. I know.

A month since I’ve written or posted on my blog… I know. I know. How am I going to have a successful blog if I don’t write on it every day or at least once a week. Well, life happens. Let’s put it like that.

It’s 2:30am and just a day, I’ve went to being fine to horribly not okay. I mean I can get through the day and be fine, but it still runs in my mind. So you will probably see me writing a lot of emotional stories about me and whats going on. Not really ready to talk about it right now, how I feel is like picking the right time to pluck an orange from its tree. You don’t want to do it too soon or late, you want to be the perfect time to let it go.

I’m sorry for not writing you guys. Just a lot been going on, but I am really going to try write more. It will probably be late, like this, but I will definitely do it. Leave me comments for motivation and confidence. I could really use it right now. πŸ™‚